Dear Annie: Soon-to-be-divorced friend keeps making me uncomfortable

Miss Manners answers a question about a friend who wants to talk but not listen

How do I get her to stop?

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Dear Annie: For three years, my husband and I got really close with another couple. But in the last year, our friend’s marriage hit a rough patch. She’s been acting different -- bragging, being arrogant and talking a lot about meeting other guys.

Now she’s going through a divorce, and every time we talk, it’s all about the men she’s meeting and how great they are compared to her soon-to-be ex-husband. During her last visit, after a few drinks, she even showed us pictures of these guys.

I told her I don’t want to hear about it or see those pictures, but she keeps texting me with the same stuff. My husband says I shouldn’t be friends with her anymore, and I get why he feels that way.

I’m stuck and not sure what to do. The friend I used to have fun with is gone, and I’m wondering if it’s time to say goodbye to our friendship. -- Friendship Dilemma

Dear Friendship Dilemma: Dealing with a friend’s changing behavior during a divorce can be tough. It’s clear that your friend is going through a challenging time, and her coping mechanisms might not align with your values.

Consider having an open and honest conversation with your friend. Let her know how her behavior is impacting you and that you need some space. If she values the friendship, she may take your concerns to heart. But if the situation continues to be stressful, it might be necessary to distance yourself.

Friendships evolve, and sometimes it’s OK to outgrow them. Focus on nurturing relationships that bring positivity into your life.

Annie  Lane

Stories by Annie Lane

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology -- featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation -- is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to


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